Smells like candy

Took the girls through the car wash today.

Hailey hates it and spent most of the time screaming with fear.

I shut the panel for the moon roof and it got quiet. 

I turn behind me to see this.

Hannah:  "It's ok buds.  I'll protect you.  See it's not so bad.  It smells like candy.  Can you smell that?  It smells good doesn't it?"

Gotta love the cell phone camera.

Mob Boss

She doesn't look the part.

She looks like a sweet little, goofy girl who is full of life.

Most days she is however lately I have thought of her more as a Mob Boss.

She wakes up in the morning and wants to snuggle for a few minutes.  She is as sweet as ever and then decides she wants breakfast.
"Make me something to eat and get me a drink."

Whoa- excuse me?  You can ask nicer than that.

"Please."  (said in a very matter of fact way with a touch of attitude)

Home from daycare and sitting on the couch watching a few minutes of her show before daddy turns on the news.

"Hailey.  Get me drink for me."

Hailey walks over to the fridge and gets her drink for her.

35 lbs of spunk sitting on the couch bossing everyone around.

The sad part is most of us give in to her and give her what she is asking for.

She sure knows how to turn the sweet on but she has got a side to her that can make a mom a little-wee bit nervous.

I think it's time to start telling the boss no once in a while.

Make that a few more

Ever since I blogged about the number of words Hailey says Hannah, Brian and I have been thinking of more and more.  These are my two newest favorites :-)

Regulars

Today I spent my day working at Bethesda.  I was either in a conference room surrounded by coworkers or in the visitor area on a conference call.  I had a few hours sprinkled throughout the day where I wasn't in a meeting so during those times I worked from the cafeteria.

There was a pretty steady flow of people in and out of the cafeteria.  Employees stopping in to get their morning coffee.  Small groups of employees on their first break of the day. A few employees finishing up for the day and stopping in for their coffee to help them stay awake on their drive home.

Whatever it was and whomever they were one thing was constant.

The lady in blue in this picture.

She was on her break sitting by the door.  She would great almost every person that walked in.  Most people she knew by name and if she didn't know their name she knew what they were there to get "We have those caramel rolls you like today.  I just made a fresh pot of decaf for you.  There you are- must have been a busy night if you are just getting out now." 

I sat back for a few minutes watching and listening.

It took me back to those days at the Bingo Hall. 

You can't help but remember the regulars.  Some people are just creatures of habit and would order the same thing every day.  I knew their orders and somedays the line would be quiet as I filled orders while they pulled out their wallets to pay - noone had to say a word.   Tammy worked there with me most weekend nights and usually those nights we would work the fastest.  We knew these people and what they wanted.  The people who wanted extra ice, those that wanted extra butter, people who wanted the popcorn kernels, the ones that wanted a lid on their coffee, those that didn't want a lid on their coffee, etc.

For a few minutes today I actually missed it. 

I said a few minutes...

Warm butt

Brrr....my hands were cold.
I was downstairs on the computer blogging.
Hannah came and sat on my lap.  I put my hands on her belly so she could feel how cold they were.

"I'll warm them up for you.  Just put them here in my warm butt!"

It still makes me giggle...

Just a crack

I had a lot of tasks to complete today at work and just needed a few hours of 'alone' time to get some stuff done.    Anyone who really knows me knows that I work best when the music is loud.  So, I wanted to turn the iPod on and wanted it fairly loud so I thought it would be most respectful if I shut the door to my office.

I always feel bad doing this- it feels rude- although I know it's not and would never stop anyone from coming in anyways but still...makes me feel like I am being a little rude.

So to compromise I left it cracked open a little bit.  Not sure why but it made me feel a little better about it.

Time to be an adult....

Over a year and a half ago I broke a tooth.

It took me almost a year before I went to the dentist to check it out (I hate dentists!).

At that time they recommended that I get a root canal and a crown.

It took me a few months to schedule the root canal but I finally did.

The procedure was actually pretty easy.  I was surprised.  It took a long time but I was so numb that I didn't feel any pain at all.  

Next up- time to schedule my appt for the crown.  The Endodontist recommended going to the dentist within the next 4-6 weeks.  Well, it took me 2 1/2 months but I finally scheduled an appt.

When I called to schedule they told me they could get me in that same day.  HA- HA!  Yeah, right!

I was going to need time to prepare for this.

Not a lot of time but a least a few days.

I scheduled the first appointment for the 30th (today).  I showed up and checked in.

"OK, thank you Amy.  That will be $500- how would you like to pay?"

"WHAT?!  Excuse me?  $500 for what?  I am not prepared to pay that today.  What is that for?  Doesn't my insurance pay for that?"

The ladies there weren't very helpful at all and just kept saying, that's your portion of the cost- you will need to pay that before we will do the procedure.

I was totally taken back and caught off guard so I left.

I felt like I needed to call the insurance company and get this squared away before I paid $500 for something that I thought insurance should cover.

I sat on the phone with the insurance company and after about 30 minutes discovered why my portion of this service would cost $500.  The dentist was also planning on doing 4 fillings today- I have requested white fillings in the past and today learned that the white composite fillings will cost me 40% of their lofty price of  $160 each.  Add in my $25 deductible and 40% of the crown and build up cost and there it was $481.44 (my portion).

I was finally going to be an adult and take care of this and then this happened.  Guess I won't be much of an adult today after all.

Now I hate the dentist even more....

He won't bite you

unless you hit at him, or tease him, or pull his tail, or be really mean to him.

He only bites kids when they give him a bone and he gets too excited.

This was Hannah's explanation as to why her cousin Adam shouldn't be scared of Nash. 

She really wants Adam to come over for a sleepover however, Adam is afraid of the dog.  Really afraid.

Here he was a few years ago.  He jumped up on the seat as soon as the dog came outside.  Poor fella!



By the way.....Nash doesn't bite. 

Blessing or Lesson?

I work with a woman named Tammy.

Since the first day I met her I knew she was different from most people that I would work with in my life.  At the time I wasn't quite sure what it was but I just knew.

We were working in my office one of the first projects we worked on together.  When she got up to leave she stopped in the doorway and turned around to thank me.  She said something along the lines of "Thank you for taking the time to work with me.  I am truly grateful for this and really appreciate it."

I get thanked a lot.  While holding the door for others, for quick follow up in email, answering a question over the phone, etc. People are generally grateful so hearing Thank You isn't uncommon however, this wasn't just a thank you.  It was a heartfelt appreciation.

A few years have gone by and Tammy is still appreciative. 

It doesn't matter who you are or how much you have done.  At the end of every meeting and every encounter she takes time to appreciate you.

Tammy is the kind of person that asks how you are and really wants the answer.  It's not small talk or just a way to acknowledge that you are in the same space together.  She really means it and really wants to know.

She is someone that I have been able to talk to lately and share some of my frustrations and stress with.  I have appreciated having a colleague at work that I can trust and someone who is truly listening and trying to find a way to help reduce some of the stress.

Tammy is the most kind and heartfelt person I have ever met.  She is a good person, deep down-no strings attached good.  I envy the way that she can work hard at her job and give so much of herself to the people that she works with.  I defintely feel that I lack in that area.  I am usually too selfish thinking about how I feel and focusing on my own stressors that I rarely take time to help others through theirs.  I know that's not my job and not what I get paid to do but at the end of the day that's what people will remember about you.    You know that old saying:  'People will forget what did or said but they will never forget how you made them feel.'   Defintely a blessing.

She shared a story with me once that really stuck out.  It was about the hospital that she used to work at in San Diego.  She poured her heart and soul into her job.  Many times this meant working late and carrying loads of stress around with her.  She went 'back home' a while back and stopped in at a gas station near the site of the old hospital (that has since been torn down).  She made a comment to the store clerk about how things had changed and how she spent a lot of time around that area at ____ hospital (sorry I don't remember the name).  The guy behind the counter made a comment about how he had never heard of that hospital.  She reminds me of this story every so often and how she regrets those days of giving her heart and soul to her job and her work instead of where it really belonged- with her friends and family.  She gave everything to her job and here she is a few years later and there are people that don't even know that the place existed. 

Definitely a life lesson for her and I appreciate that she shared it with me and reminds me of what's important.

I told Tammy about my blog and she was very interested in it.  The next time I saw her I brought in my printed book to show her.  She looked through it and tears filled her eyes.  She then shared with me how she felt about me and the type of person that she thinks I am. 

This happened at the perfect time.  I needed that.

The Help

MAN!  I love that smile!

I had a little help cleaning the house tonight.

Miss Hannah, all dressed up in her 'ballgame hat and Hello Kitty rainboots' vaccumed the living room for me.

She actually did a pretty decent job too!

Thanks little buddy!

No Worries

Loriann bought me this for Boss' Day.

It sits on my desk and whenever I am feeling a little overwhelmed I look at it and try to take a few deeps breaths.  When I first had this we were in the beginning of our Order/Charge roll out- which today seems like the biggest thing ever and in a few months we will look back at these days and they will be no big deal.  Over all this roll out has gone really well.  There have been a few things that have come up and there is a lot of 'busy' work that must be done each time a new clinic comes live so we are constantly moving and along with all of the other projects we are working on things are especially stressful right now.

Lately I have been having more and more trouble 'keeping it together'.

I feel super stressed and I am not so good about hiding those feelings.

I haven't been as positive as I like to be and the feelings of defeat have returned.

I left my office the other day and when I returned this guy was sitting in front of my keyboard- placed there by a certain someone who knew just the reminder that I needed that this too shall pass.

Keep your head up- we'll get through this!

She's right!  This is nothin'! 

Bring it on!

Should I really do it?

Hannah:  "Mom, should I really do it?"

Mom:  "Do what?"

Hannah:  "Put my head all the way under the water.  Should I?  Are you ready for this?"

Mom:  "Yes, you should do that?  Do you think you can?"

Hannah:  "Yes, I probably can.  Should I really do it?  I'm so nervous! (followed up with a squealing giggle)"

Hannah:   "Here I go mom, watch me. "

I didn't even get a chance to lift my head before she said "Mom, look at me, with your real eyes.  I'm gonna do it.  Should I?"

This went on and on for a few minutes until she finally just went for it and dunked her head. 

Good job buddy!

Looks like someone is ready for some swimming lessons!

Pooh is for potty

Hailey has been potty training since around Thanksgiving time.

She will go days where she is dry at daycare and nights where she is dry during the evening. But the problem is in her drive with dad from daycare (where she is dry) to home (where she will be dry some evenings) she soaks her diaper.

She is still really wet at night but will stay dry during her naps.

She knows when she needs to go and doesn't like being wet anymore so will ask to be changed a lot of times right after she's gone but she is still kinda lazy about it.

You can ask her every 15 minutes if she needs to go to the bathroom adn a lot of times she will take you up on the offer and half the times she'll squeeze something out.

Some days she's so good that she'll go in the bathroom and you'll hear a flush because she just did it all on her own with out the announcements.

One day I decided to try big girl undies on her.  I thought that maybe that's the little push of excitement she would need to put the finishing touches on the long drawn out process.

She LOVED it!

All night long she would tell us about her undies by pulling down her pants and pointing "Or- A" (Dora undies)  Within the first hour she had wet her undies and was standing in a puddle of potty.

Back to diapers I guess.

Trouble is- this little girl got a taste of big girl panites and now she is hooked.

Not enough to keep her dry but she can't get them out of her mind.

When I announce "Girls, it's time to get dressed"

Hailey runs off and tries to sneak undies on and get her pants or jammies on before I make it into the room.

She'll get there soon.  She's super close and maybe a trip to the store for some new undies might just do the trick after all.

Resturlant

Mommy picking up the customers from the bottom of the stairs:  "Hello ladies, just two tonight?"

Hannah and Hailey in unison: "Yep"

Mommy: "Ok, right this way.  Here you go.  Have a seat and I will be right with you."

Find two cups, make a menu, deliver cups to table.

Mommy:  "Here are the menus for tonight."

Hannah:  "Thank you ma'am"

Hailey "Que mommy"

Mommy: "I will give you a few minutes and then come and check on you to take your order.  Can I get you anything to drink to start with?"

Hannah: "I'll take a coke."

Hailey: "Yeah.  Diet Coe K"

Go upstairs, make chocolate milk, listen to Hannah and Hailey talking about the menu and getting excited about the choices for the night, deliver to the customers.

Mommy:  "Have you decided?"

Hannah: " Yes.  What comes with this? (pointing to the vanilla ice cream choice)"

Mommy: "We have sprinkles, chocolate sauce, M & Ms , and fish sticks to top the ice cream"

Hannah and Hailey in unison while giggling "Ewwwww- fish sticks!"

Hannah: "I will have this and she will have this." (pointing to the items)

Hailey : "Me!"  (pointing to the items)

Get the Frostys, deliver them to the girls, prepare the check.

Deliver the check, thank the customers, check on them a few more times until their done, clean up table.

Part time job, done for the night.

You are breaking my heart, kid

Being a parent is hard.  Not just due to the constantly moving little people, or the messes that need to be tended to.  It doesn't really have anything to do with the number of loads of laundry you will do or dirty diapers that you will change.  It's not the hours of sleep that you will sacrifice or dollars that will be spent each month.

It's moments like this...

We had a rough night tonight. 

Hannah was melting down (or broken as Brian likes to call it).

She didn't nap yesterday and we were up the night before so she probably really needed the sleep.

It started at dinner.  She wouldn't eat.  Not in a defiant sort of way but in a I-have-better-things-to-do type of way.  Brian and I had to keep reminding her to eat, telling her that if she didn't eat there would be no treats, etc.  Finally the timer came out.  You have 15 minutes to finish eating and if you don't, no treat.

The 15 minutes passed and her plate was still full.

She was informed that she wasn't getting a treat but she still didn't believe us.  We kept reminding her when she would talk about what she was planning on having for her treat and each time she would start bawling again.  She knows what she is doing and she knows what she has to do.  She understands consequences but we usually don't have very 'strict' rules about things.  They pretty much get what they want and do what they want to do because they aren't bad kids.  So when their 'discipline' comes in the form of no treat after supper (seriously?!  not like I'm making you do something horrible) it's a big deal.  She obviously thought we would give in so when we stood our ground she was pretty upset.  I know these little things will set the groundrules for those 'real things' that will happen later in our lives together but to have such a rough night over not eating supper- it sucks.

Hannah took a shower and then wanted to stay in the bath with Hailey.

They were extra 'splashy and within 10 minutes I was wearing a full glass of bath water.

Mom: "GIRLS!  How many times do I have to tell you girls to keep the water in the bathtub?!  Do you know how mad I am right now?? Thanks for that."

Hannah broke down crying.

Hannah:  "Does that mean you don't like me anymore?"

Oh kid, you just broke my heart. 

To even think for one minute that I wouldn't like you anymore?! 

Not possible.  Ever.

Hailey saw me take a picture of you so when she got out of the tub she wanted her picture taken too

A girls gotta have her shoes

Here Hailey is AGAIN in Hannah's closet trying on all of her shoes.

If Hailey is 'missing' in the house this is the first place you can usually check.  You will find her thre 75% of the time.  She is either on the floor in the middle of a pile of goods or she is already on her way out of the room sportin' her new kicks, purse on her shoulder, baby in her arms.

Tonight's choice were a pair of light up princess sandals.

Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3, Testing

I hope I have enough will power to stay away from this.

Meet Project Life:

Project Life is a scrapbooking kit that you can buy that contains precut papers, journaling squares and page protectors with different sized pockets.  The thought is that you would complete a page a week- pretty much hassle free.  A few pictures, a few embellishments, a little journaling and you are done.

My sister started hers the beginning of the year and after this blogpost of hers : Project Life, I was so jealous I was ready to start mine too.

Then I remembered that I am behind on my girls scrapbooks and already can't seem to catch up on those so, no- it would not be a good idea to take on another project right now.  I do however, LOVE this idea for some day when I decide that I am done blogging everyday or when my kids get older and don't let me take so many pictures of them.

I have been thinking about this project of my sister's almost everyday and so far my will power is winning but at the end of this year all bets are off!

00Shoe (Double O Shoe)

This morning while I was in the shower Hannah snuck into the bathroom.

There was a pile of shoes in the bathroom that were left by Hailey.  Hannah was playing with them and putting them in order from the smallest number to the largest.   I asked to her to read the numbers to me so that I can double check that she had gotten them all right.

"Four, five, seven, double O, 21"



You can't see it so well in the picture but the shoe size here is 7 1/2
upside down apparently looks like a 21 



Goodnight Sweethearts

Hannah has decided she is afraid of the dark now.

This makes bedtime extra fun (hope you can sense the scarastic tone in my voice there).

All kids go through these stages.  It's part of their development and part of growing up.

There used to be days when the nightlight in her room was too bright and she needed it off and now she won't fall asleep without the hallway light on and her door cracked.

These girls have always gone to bed pretty easily.  Occasionally we would have a fight when it was time to bring them to their beds but lately things seem to be getting worse.  Still not horrible but just not as easy as it used to be.

Some nights after the girls are put down I come downstairs, get settled in, start a show or fire up the computer to get some work done and then it starts....."Mommy!"

99.9% of the time it's Hannah.

She either needs to brush her teeth, go potty, change her jammies, tell me something she forgot to tell me, she's too hot, she's too cold, needs a Kleenex, wants to know what that sound was, or wants another kiss and hug.  Most times it's only once but some nights she summons me 3 or 4 times during the evening.

Tonight both girls were calling for us.

I know we are super duper lucky and blessed that our kids go to bed as well as they do.  Sometimes that hurts us though because we don't know what it really means to have a child that doesn't go to bed well.  So nights like this seem like the worst thing ever.  It's hardly even bad.  It's annoying a little but bad?!  I think not. 

Shhhh, don't tell them I said that though.  Don't want them to think it's ok.

One step closer

I don't know how to feel about these things.

Hannah has decided that she wants to take showers now.  Afterall, she is a big-kid grown up and that's what big-kid grown ups do.

So, here I sit.  Waiting for her to call for shampoo and soap.  Peeking in every so often to make sure that she is in the water washing and rinsing like she was taught.

Sure, it makes things easier on me but it is also one step closer to a little girl who doesn't need her mommy anymore.  

I do understand how ridiculous that sounds.  They will always need me and it is one step closer to freeing up time on my schedule that allows me to make room for the next phases of our lives.  But for now, I am taking this moment for my own little pity party.