U Smile, I Smile

Nothing like coming home from 3 days away and being greeted by these faces.

You girls have no idea how much you mean to your daddy and I. 

Anytime I am having a bad day I can just take one look at either one of you and for a moment I lose my breath.  Amazing to think how such little people can make such a HUGE impact!

Love you bunches!

Anyone got a shovel?

This morning's keynote speaker was Dean Kamen.

Dean Kamen is a modern-day inventor.  He holds over 440 patents, has done amazing things in his life and affected so many lives however, is best known for inventing the Segway.  He also invented the first wearable insulin pump and dialysis pump, the iRobot (a wheelchair that can climb stairs), a robotic arm- prosthetic, a water filtration system, the list goes on and on.

He talked this morning about how hard it is to get approval from the government and the FDA in order to make his ideas become a reality.  It was so moving listening to him talk about how it can be so easy to develop an idea, find the money and the need to make it happen and then sit and wait 5-15+ years before the government will actually 'approve' the idea.  The red tape and hoops that have to be jumped through in order to allow people like Dean Kamen the chance to change lives is incredible.....such a sad, dysfunctional situation.

He showcased his new water purifier (talked about how he partnered with Coca Cola to get this to 3rd world countries) and then presented his FIRST program.  To learn more click here: http://www.usfirst.org/ 

I have been stalling on this blog entry for 2 weeks now...trying to find the words to describe this presentation and all of the information that was presented to us. I have been at a loss of words but need to try my best to get this done so I can catch up on my blog :-)

It is hard to describe what I was feeling on that day during Dean's time with us.  My face and eyes were covered in tears.  Tears to represent joy, sadness, discomfort, amazement, frustration, encouragement- you name it I was feeling it.
During this 2 hour presentation I couldn't help but feel completely helpless and useless.  To see what this man has done to better our country, to better the lives of thousands of humans is unbelievable.  It stops and makes you think about your own life and the difference you are making.  Am I even making a difference?
Day to day I am not doing anything to make this world a better place.  I am not volunteering my time to help the underprivileged.  I am not addressing any worldly issues and for the most part I don't even want to vote since I get so frustrated with politics in the first place.

One could argue that I am making a difference just by working hard, paying taxes, and raising two adorable little girls.  Am I?  Am I doing the best that I can do?

I like to think that I am making a difference at work.  I really do love what I do but lately have felt defeated more times than I can count. 
I know deep down that by providing an application and support structure that allows staff to better care for patients in the long run means that the work we are doing affects patient lives but I don't get to feel any of that.  I do get to feel the pressure though.  I get the feedback from the users regarding what they don't have that they need.  I get feedback from employees regarding what they think should be done or what they don't have that they need.  I get feedback from patients, corporate services, other IT depts, other areas within the system regarding what they need and don't have.  I also get the pleasure of hearing what the government needs and wants.  And then me and my team get the pleasure to try to figure out how to align all of that work.

Most days I feel like I run around all day listening to people vomiting on me about their concerns/issues/frustrations/needs/wants and then I race home to my little angels that share those same things with me the moment I walk in the door. 
Now, add to that the fact that I am not only a manager at work but I have a family, husband, children, dog, and house that need my attention too.  I didn't even mention my friends in there did I?- I don't get to put anytime into those relationships because everything else is coming first.  I am starting to feel really overwhelmed with all of the demands and the fact that I feel like I spend most of my days tending to others needs or wants or those things that need to get done (shopping, housework, etc). 
I am one of the millions of people that feel this way and I am by no means thinking that I am unique with these feelings.  Just finding it hard to manage.

This speech today didn't help. 

I need to make a change.  Not sure what it is yet but somethings gotta give.

I need to do better than I have been and right now I am not sure I have the capacity to be better...

Go Green!

Tonight was the Green Gala.

We were instructed to wear green.  Rochelle had CRUG (Central Region User Group) shirts made for us (that we also wore at our CRUG meeting) and then Michelle bought green eyelashes and boas for the gals and a green felt hat and glasses for Ray.

I honestly figured that with 5,000 people attending a user conference, and all 5,000 being instructed to wear green, that we would blend in and probably look (dare I say) 'normal'.

Ummmm, that was not the case.  As we walked into the event we looked around and there were only about 10 people who were wearing something other than a green shirt or a green dress.  A few people had green sashes and one guy sprayed his hair and eyebrows green. 

The whole night people approached us and asked if they could take their picture with us, like we were the event mascots or something.  Kinda ridiculous but I guess I would rather stand out then blend into the crowd.

When the event was over we headed to one of the hotel bars, Fuse.

Gaylord Opryland

This will be my home for the next 3 days, the Gaylord Opryland Resort in Nashville, Tennessee.

This place is HUGE!

When you check in for your room they give you a map to help you find your room.  I heard that if you leave out Vegas, this is the largest hotel in the USA (2,881 rooms).

I will be here for ACE. 

The Allscripts Client Experience (National User Conference)

My agenda is full of meetings, sessions regarding meaningful use, optimizing workflows, networking with others, etc.

Today's agenda- settle in, eat lunch, meet up with the rest of the CRUG Board for dinner and then head to the Meet and Greet.

I had to leave this morning before the girls woke up.  It's always hard to leave but leaving without saying goodbye feels awful.  I know they will be ok and they will hardly notice that I am gone.  Brian tried to talk me into enjoying my time away but I know that the next three days will have me running around and will keep me so busy that I will hardly feel like I am getting a break.  I had about 2 hours alone today between events and instead of taking it in and exploring the resort, reading or watching TV, I sat on the bed missing my family and reading emails. 

The Great Minnesota Get Together

Today we went to the fair with the Busta's for our annual trip to eat fried pickles.

We decided to try the free Park 'N Ride and it worked pretty slick.

Shane's parents were in town so they joined us and it was real nice to have extra hands and eyes to help with the kids....not to mention the extra mouths to help us eat ;-)

  The weather could not have been more perfect!

The spread consisted of

Cheese Curds

Onion Rings

Corn

Diet Coke

Beer

Mini Donuts

French Fries

Deep fried Oreos

Deep fried Snickers

Choc Chip Cookies

Sweet Corn Ice Cream

Chicken on a stick

Raspberry Sundae

The only thing we wanted to get that we didn't end up getting was the deep fried choc chip cookie dough.

What's next?

I haven't ran much since I completed the 5K and it is starting to bother me.  Especially since when I started running it was never my plan to sign up for one and now that it is done there is a sense of accomplishment and I haven't been holding myself very accountable for continuing to get out.

That can only mean one thing.  I need another app.

Meet the Ease into 10K program.  10 weeks and it claims you should be able to run 6 miles.
This should be interesting....

Mirror, mirror, on the wall

When I woke Hailey up this morning and asked if she was ready to go to Jackie's she said 'Yeah".  I knew right then that it was going to be a good morning.  Hailey can be a BEAR to wake in the morning.  If she isn't ready she will let you know it- pull the covers over her head, hide under her pillow, crawl to the furthest end of her crib, point and me and yell 'No!'. 

I grabbed her out of her crib and asked her if she wanted to pick her outfit for the day.  She got real excited, jumped down and picked out the dress she is wearing in these pictures.

When we went upstairs we got Hannah dressed.  Hannah wanted a ponytail and as soon as we started brushing Hailey came running over yelling 'Me!'  I brushed her hair and then we put a barrette in her hair.  She jumped down from my lap and ran into the bathroom.  Wasn't really sure what she was doing until I heard Brian say "What are you doing?  Checking yourself out?"

Sure enough she grabbed the mirror and was very pleased with what she saw!

We then went to the kitchen to get shoes on.  Hailey got her shoes then ran into the living room- it was a run with a purpose so I knew that she was up to something.  She came back in with her glasses on and her purse on her shoulder.  She was finally ready to go.

Get out of the car and I hear "Mommy, take another picture of us outside like last time."

*click, click, click*

A few pictures were taken and then shown to the girls.

Hannah then says "Oh Mom, you need to update those for me.  They are all so cute that I can't decide.  We better update them to the computer."

POP goes the party!

I got a text this morning saying "Grandma is having a popcorn party tonight at 7.  Everyone is invited.  Call grandma with questions."  It was a Wednesday, the girls have daycare tomorrow, I have work.  It's hard to do things 'in the cities' on weeknights since that means driving 30-40 minutes in to hangout and then 30-40 minutes home at night.  The kids will sleep in the car on the way home but it's disruptive and when you are a family of a pretty normal and consistent routine, the littlest change to that can be enough to send people into the crankies the next day.
I called grandma to tell her thanks for the invite but we wouldn't be making it and her response to me was "Well, that's ok honey. I know it's hard with the girls.  I just felt I had to do something to celebrate so I decided why not a popcorn party!".  Celebrate?   This is a celebration?  For?
Tunrs out this popcorn party was grandma's version of a bachelorette and bachelor party. 

By the way, my mom and Tom are getting married tomorrow- Congrats you two!

Well, grandma sure out did herself with this one!  There was popcorn, alright- plain popcorn, cheese popcorn, caramel popcorn, puffcorn, flamin' hot puffcorn, popcorn with cashews, popcorn without cashews. 

Finish Line

My mom, Tom, Andy, Kas, and Tin came to cheer us on during the 5K.  They were at the finish line and happened to snap some pics as we all crossed.
Here is my very happy version

Afterwards we posed with the Karhu bear.  This race was sponsored by Karhu and the first 10 racers to beat the bear won a free pair of Karhu shoes.  There were only 3 people that could out run him and he ran the 5K in 19 minutes.  In that bear suit.

Hey wait!  Take it over, the bear wasn't smiling! 

Take me out to the ball game

Yesterday, after the 5K, Brian and I finally used the tickets that Stacey gave us for my birthday back in March.  Knowing that we had tickets for the afternoon and the run in the morning, it made most sense to have the girls stay over night at Grammy and Grandpa's so that we wouldn't have to worry about running them around or dropping them off, etc.

It was a gorgeous day and even though the Twins lost (they stink this year), it was fun to be with my honey.  It was just what I needed!

A 5K kinda day

I DID IT!

Today was the day I have been thinking about for the past 7 weeks.

My sister, Kari, found out that I had started running and mentioned that we should run a 5K while she is home.  My emotions were all over the place on this one.  I went from 'YES!' to 'Nah' to 'maybe', back to 'Yes' then back to 'I don't think I should.' 

Then I found out that Jennie, Kim, and Kristin were all in when she mentioned it to them so I knew that I had to now.  You can't have a sister's 5K without me!

According to my C25K program I would just be finishing my 9 week program so the run they signed up for fit perfectly into my 'already-in-progress' plan.

My decision was made.  I was going to do it.

I was not too convinced that I was going to be able to handle it.  The longer my runs got during training, the harder they got.  I would look at the GPS run tracker and see that I had only gone 2.2-2.5 miles and even though it felt real good- I had run the first and last 5 minutes of the time (that distance was included in the 2.2-2.5 miles) and I could not imagine how I was going to find enough energy or stamina to run another .8-.6 miles!  I had to keep reminding myself that it is a walker friendly course and if I can't run the whole thing, who cares.  (Jennifer said it best today) 'It's not about the time, it's about the fact that I am in the game'

She's right!

Even when I was in my best shape when I was younger I never ran 3 miles.  Maybe 1 or a little more but never 3.    I hadn't run in over 10 years.  seriously.  I just want to show up and try it out.

The race started at 7:00 am so around 6:45 we lined up at the starting line and started stretching a little.  Then we were off....

Accomplishments of the day

1.  I ran the whole time! 

2.  I finished in less than 45 minutes (which was my real goal- I never said I was fast)

3.  At the end I didn't feel like I wanted to die.

The whole experience was pretty awesome!  You get an amazing runners-high when you are done and instead of feeling like I wanted to die I felt like I wanted to try again!  Not today, but another time this year.  At least one more.

Probably my favorite part of the day was when I was done with the race and I texted Brian to tell him that I finished and he texted me back that he was proud of me.  I have had so much support from my friends and family and I have appreciated it all so much.  I especially appreciate how supportive Brian has been during this past 9 weeks when I had this bright idea that I needed to finally get my butt of the couch to do something and instead of nagging me when I would skip a night or teasing me when I would come home with a beet red face he would work with me to assure that I could get out or help me put the girls to bed so that I could get going.

I have gotten a few emails, texts, and Facebook messages from friends saying that I have motivated them to get started and many of them have started the C25K program themselves.  It's amazing to think that I could have motivated anyone but I am glad to hear it!  I hope they all stick with it and get to experience what I did today.

Special thanks to Loriann, my sisters, Jennifer, Karri and Tammy who encouraged me and let me talk W_D_ with them ALL THE TIME.  I know that I was probably more than annoying ;-)

A little end of the race pose



Yay us!



Jennie:  33:56

Amy:  36:41

Kari:  41:46

Kim:  35:34

Kristin:  35:35

Oh, and I realize that I didn't win an oscar.  For some this might not be a huge deal.  It was to us and it is something that I am super proud of!

Cutest Dress EVER

Grammy Judy made these dresses for the girls. Today is the first time that we were all together and had an opportunity to get all the girls in their dresses for a picture.

Everytime the girls wear these dresses we get so many compliments.  I wish that Judy was with us all those times so that she could get all the props for her work.  The colors are amazing, the style of the dress is adorable and I guess the people inside of the dresses probably have something to do with the reactions.

If you look really close you can see that Courtney's baby, Blondie, also has a matching dress. 

Yep- cutest thing ever!

Leave it to my Bean Machine to silly things up a bit.  

Hailey wasn't real sure what to do with the directions to make a silly face.

Making Do

What do you do when you want to reach something that is on the counter?

Grab a stepstool quarter of an inch thick book, of course!

P.S.  She still couldn't reach, imagine that :-)

Tank 'Em

Tonight Tammy dropped off the Tastefully Simple order. 

Along with that she also dropped off a bag of shoes, a vest, snowpants and a winter coat.  Thank you!

Hannah loves getting hand-me-downs from her friends and tonight she was extra thrilled with the Sketchers Twinkletoes shoes and the vest that is making it's appearance in this picture.

She wore them both all night until it was time for her to go to bed.  She informed me that she would probably just wear those things to Jackie's tomorrow.

When Hannah was little she couldn't say Thank You so she would say Tank 'Em.  Hailey prefers Tink Eeew.
So adorable!  I really need to video tape these two more often.

Being Silly

Tonight the girls were being silly.
I was standing in the kitchen and Hannah said "Mom, take a picture of me doing this."

Then I hear "Me!"

Bubbles, Bubbles

Bubble, bubbles here and there

Bubble, bubbles everywhere!

Bubbles, bubbles are so fun

Bubbles, bubbles for everyone!

New Route

Tonight I decided to switch things up a bit so I took a new route while out on my run.

While I was out, hitting about the 1.5 mile mark, a cute little soccer-mom lookin' chic ran by me with her cute little swinging ponytail and her cute little running outfit.  She waves to me and then out of her mouth comes a huge bubble gum bubble.  Whatever.....  

She kinda made me feel like a chump.  I am sure that my face was already beat red and my hair was soaked with sweat.  I am sure that she could care less about it and didn't think a thing about it but it did motivate me a little bit tonight to push a little harder.



All together 2.72 miles

 Our 5K is coming up this Sunday.  When I am out running I can't stop thinking 'how in the world am I going to find the energy and stamina to go another 1/2 mile" but then when I really think about it, a 1/2 mile isn't all that far I guess.  I got this.

Rock-a-bye

I had to make sure that I made it up to the cabin this weekend.  Andres came in to town on Thursday night and I needed to see him.  It's been nice having Kari and the boys here but it's also weird without Andres, it just doesn't feel complete.  Before we all packed up to leave Sunday we decided we needed to take the boat out. 

So, out came the tractor to carry the chairs, on went the life jackets and off we went!

It took lots of convincing mom that we didn't have enough people, we had enough gas, we were not going to sink, etc, etc.

About half way into our ride I noticed that Hailey was starting to tip forward.  Turns out the ride was just what she needed to help with her afternoon snooze!

Within the next 5 minutes Hannah and Nicolas were sleeping too :-)

(couldn't get pictures of them since my arms were full with this one)

A Saturday afternoon in Somerset

Today the girls and I drove out to Somerset, WI for Marlee and Talon's Birthday Party.

The girls were real excited to see their new friends again.

Loriann and Josh were great hosts!  Providing tours, getting drinks, making sure everyone had what they needed and more.  

These pictures were taken by Loriann and remind me so much of pictures that were taken of Hannah last summer.  She sent me some GREAT other pictures but I think I will save some of my favorites for future postings when I have things to write about but no pictures.  They make me miss my camera! 

Divas

"Mom, you should take a picture of us today!"

"Hailey, here buds, come by me and take a picture with your head by mine."

(yes, the picture posted earlier this week of Hailey was taken this same day.  It was too cute not to use)

My Big Sisters

Tonight Kari, Jenny and I had dinner at Granite City.

Bree and Alana meet us there too but I didn't feel right posting their picture since I don't really know how they would feel about it.

Jenny lived across the alley from us.  You could get to her house by leaving our yard and then hanging a quick right into the yard across the alley.  Jenny and my sister, Kari were best friends for as long as I can remember.  They went to elementary school, junior high, and high school together and even though I knew they were best friends all those years, I remember very few times that they were actually together playing when they were in elementary school.  I remember a few times (and of course heard through the years about many more times) that my sister would invite Jenny over and then be upset all evening that she 'couldn't' come over.  Kari would have to 'settle' for a book or the other kids in the neighborhood.  That quickly changed the older they got.  As they entered Junior High and High school I can remember these two together ALL THE TIME!

They would spend hours walking up and down the alley, Jenny with her barefeet kicking rocks- those poor heels! :-)   They would spend hours and hours playing music and talking down in Kari's room.  Every once in a while they would go to Jenny's house and every so often they would let me tag along.  They were my big sisters, of course I wanted to always be where they were. 

I was always jealous of their friendship, even though I had plenty of close friends of my own.

When Kari and I lived together on Idaho we saw Jenny a lot!  It was the BEST!

By this time I was 'old enough' that they actually seemed like they liked to have me around.

I love that no matter how long it has been since we saw each other last, we pick up like it was just yesterday.  There's no time wasted with 'why haven't you called me's' or 'you have my email/phone number, etc, why don't you use it's'.  It's just filled with smiles, hugs, and lots and lots of laughter!

Love you two!

I wish I could quit you!

I have tried many times and at the end of the day it always comes back to this.

I don't even think that I drink that much Diet Coke, only about 2-3 cans a day.

It's not really about the amount that I drink, it's about the fact that it's all that I want to drink. 

(and it's not even that good....truly- think about it the next time you take a drink)

One of these days I am going to give it up for good.

maybe...

Coming out of your shell

Our shy little girl is finally starting to come out of her shell!

I have had two different people at daycare tell me that since the kids have been back from vacation they have noticed a change in Hailey.  Both people commented on how she came back with 'such a little personality'.  Jackie had noticed that when they are at the park, Hailey is much more social and will talk to the other kids and isn't sticking to Jackie like glue.  Isabelle's dad also mentioned that she is starting to smile at him and make faces.

Now that they mention this, I have noticed a change in her.

She has always been different when she is home with us then when she is out in public but I have noticed that when we are out she is much more friendly.

I am excited for everyone to finally meet the real Hailey!

Choose your own adventure

Remember the Choose Your Own Adventure books?  Where you would read the story and then as part of the story you would either flip to page x or page y to see what happens next. 

Well, today wasn't anything like that but I liked the title for this entry today and it seemed appropriate to reference the books.  Can't say that I actually ever even read one of those books but I know my sister, Kari, did and since she talked about them I think I should get credit too.

Adventure #1
Kids woke up this morning around 8:00am.  As I was opening doors and windows to let in the fresh air and natural light I entered the screen porch and immediately heard a rattling noise coming from near the window.
It sounded like a masked murderer was behind the blinds and he was MAD, maybe blinded for a minute (maybe from the mask), and was trying to untangle from the cords, etc.  I quickly closed the french doors and looked back to the window to see who was there.
All I could see what a gray bushy tail poking out from the bottom of the shades.  Next thing I know a squirrel looks over to me and when he realizes that I was looking back at him with my posse, noses pressed against the glass, he started freaking out jumping from window sill to window sill.  There was a flash- well not really but it sounds better in the story- and then he was gone.  Last I saw he was standing on the window sill, he must have dropped down to the floor and is waiting under the table or something until it was safe to attempt his second chance at an escape.
I sent my mom in the porch to survey the situation.  Afterall, who would keep the posse calm :-)  I had to stay there, for the kids.
Mom propped the door open and then poked around with a broom and after about 5 minutes we realized that he must be gone.    As mom was closing the door she looked at the window and noticed a huge hole in the screen.

Looks like the escape route

He left this behind also

Adventure #2

For the past year mom and Tom have been working on the pontoon to get it working.  Well, take that back, Tom has been working on the pontoon.  It is finally ready and so it was a must that we go out on the lake today.  I can't remember the last time I have been in a boat on that lake.
A must.

Kas and Hannah and their best attempt at Peace signs :-)

Grandma Chris let the kids take turns driving

Such a beautiful today to be out on the boat.  Another reason to look forward to the cabin weekends.

A good day for a parade

Waiting for the parade to start



Mom and me.  Can't remember the last time we got a picture of just the two of us



Nico, Agus, and Kristin before the parade (candy storm) began

 This weekend was the Pine County Fair and Parade.   We tackled the fair last night for a few hours so today we went back into town for the parade.  It rained most of the day today and just about an hour before the parade began we were talking to the kids about how we were going to have to have our own parade since the parade in town would be cancelled.
Within minutes of that conversation, the sky cleared, turned bright blue, the sun came out and the weather was perfect for a parade.  Hurry!  Let's wake up Hailey and head into town!

Hailey collecting her stash

Hannah about half way through the parade, that bag was bulging by the end

The kids had a good time.  Hannah stayed close to grandma for most of the parade, she was not a huge fan of the loud marching bands.  Hailey couldn't get enough.  My used-to-be shy little girl was standing in the middle of the street (well, about 6-12 inches from the curb) and dancing to the music that went by waving to anyone and everyone that would pay attention to her.  She was so cute and adorable that I like to think that she was the real attraction for the day.